Welcome to the 48th issue of Lit*er*al*ly, Ororo, a weekly blog by me, Ororo Munroe, speaking my truth inspired by the 3000 Questions About Me journal. I mean, it’s a personal blog. And since I’ll be sharing all my personal bits, why not do so in the not-so-typical form of questions? Thanks for reading. Participation is encouraged.
571. Who is your favorite dancer?
OMG, Michael Jackson. Hands down. Like, no one else compares. He was a worldwide influence on the music and dance industry, it’s just amazing. There will only ever be one Michael.
572. Did you do anything special for your 16th birthday, and if so, what?
Wow. I wish I could remember, but I don’t! I mean, I’m sure I had cake. Maybe a sleepover? But by then, my friend circle was pretty small, so I don’t think I had a party.
573. If you wrote your will right now, who would the beneficiary (-ies)?
I do have a will (although it’s not notarized) that I got through this place and Sis and my niece are the main bennies.
574. What talent were you gifted at, that comes naturally?
Dancing. Man, I love to dance. I took a dance class one semester in high school and LURVED it. I even got to be a part of a dance concert. But I got a low grade in one of my other classes (probably math because I suck donkey balls in that subject) and wasn’t able to continue the following semester. I took a dance class my first year in community college and would’ve loved to continue, but the parental units were footing the bill for college, so I had to take the courses that I was voluntold to take. #thwarted I was a little a lot pissed about that, so when I was finally allowed to get a job, I found a dance studio that taught hip hop classes.
In my late 20s and living on my own, I was hitting up the nightclubs with my BFF every. Single. Weekend. On Friday nights, we would rotate nightclubs, but on Saturdays. Oh, it was ON like Donkey Kong at this one nightclub, Rodeo Nights (can’t believe I remembered the name!). It was a HUGE place with country music (including an electric bull) on one side and hip hop/Top 40 etc. on the other. We would go because of the male revue then stay after to dance. The show would be for an hour, and they would close off the country side entrance with a curtain. I mean, guys could come over and watch the show, but y’know, none ever did. Because, y’know, half-naked men and all. That side would open up after the show, but for that one hour, it was full of screaming women watching gorgeous guys strip down to stuffed (pretty sure some of them were) G-strings.
It was nothing like Chippendales or Magic Mike of course, but the eye candy was on point and the routines were surprisingly well-choreographed. James was my favorite dancer because:
1) He had sexy feet. For reals. His bare feet were sexy and that’s really saying something because feet in general are NOT sexy. They can be cute—on females, that is, not males—but never sexy. He worked the crowd in his bare feet after his routine and I always wondered how he could do that because The Floor Is Ick (not Lava).
2) He used “This Love” by Pantera for his routine. I had found Linkin Park and that type of music by then, so I really enjoyed his choice of music. Needless to say, every time I hear this song on the radio, I get a little smirky smile on my face and think of him.
3) His routine was what I would refer to as “The Shower Scene”. His prop was a portable shower. With a removeable shower head. And he would use that shower head right on beat with the song chorus. And with that grinding guitar beat….Lordty. If you’ve heard the song, you’ll (maybe) know what part I’m talking about. <fans self> I always thought it was a genius routine because he was dancing under hot lights, and he was the only guy in the group that used water, so it was almost like he was cooling off.
I went off on a tangent there. Sorry. My answer went a little wide.
575. Have you ever been disappointed by something you anticipated to be bigger than life?
Well, since I’m on a tangent about half-naked men… I was truly underwhelmed with the Thunder From Down Under1 show when the tour came through my town back in the 20-teens. I’d heard about these guys and jumped at that chance to get tickets (which were cheap… that should’ve been my first clue). Maybe it’s because the venue had been at a local hotel/casino, which meant a smaller, more intimate setting. You could tell who the newbies were when they did the group routines, and the solos were nothing to scream about because it was just a means to ends: removing the clothes. The only thing that impressed me was their MC guy. Who was H-A-W-T as fuck. His name was James, too! He was so hawt, I paid (forgot how much) to get my Polaroid taken with him after the show. And no, the hubby never saw that pic.
When I went to Vegas for my birthday a couple of years ago, I got tickets for their show because I thought, “Ok, they’ve had a residency there, for, like, umpteen years. Maybe it’ll be different because the space will be bigger, they can do more things…” Yeah. No. Once again, I was underwhelmed. I wanted those 90 minutes of my life—and my money—back. LOL
576. If you could be an explorer, what would be your expedition?
In the early days, B.eR. (Before eReaders), the library and Barnes and Noble was the supplier of my addiction and I was there every month giving them my money. LOL Despite the fact that I lurve my eReader, these two places will always be my first loves. So, I would want to explore all the unique bookstores and amazing libraries in the world. the first place I would need to visit is this place and then work my way over to this place.
577. What do you love about the internet?
1) That it’s the electronic version of the phone book. I can find and order anything I want and 2) It gives me the ability to have a (temporary) TBR pile online. I say temporary because I borrow my books through Kindle. Can’t tell you the last time I actually bought a romance book and kept it.
578. Who was the last person to knock/ring at your door?
My niece. A few weeks ago, she came over with my grephew (great nephew) and she put together my clothing rack and helped me create a gallery wall in my bathroom and over my desk. We taped out the space on the floor, moved some pics around, went to lunch, then came back and moved them around some more before she settled on the right look. Yes, I said she, because I had no idea what the hell I was doing and trusted her judgement.
579. Where is your ideal place to raise kids or start a family?
If you’ve been reading my blog from the start, then you know I don’t have kids. Never wanted them. But if I did, I’d like them to have the same childhood as I did: family neighborhood on a dead-end street with 2-3 kids in (practically) every house. But that was back in the 70’s and 80’s. These days, I would not want to raise my child(ren) in the U.S. Not when people in uniform tend to shoot first and don’t ask questions later (and get away with it). Not when I’d worry about dropping my kid off at school and wonder if they’re going to be alive when I pick them up at the end of the day.
There is so. Much. Hate going on right now that I know these other countries are giving us major side-eye, munching on popcorn and shaking their heads while watching the shitshow that is America like it’s a fucking soap opera. Right now, my ideal place to raise a family—or, hell, raise myself--would be overseas in a place like Belize, Costa Rica, or Malta or something.
580. Do you make choices based on what’s best for you—or on what’s easiest?
I make choices based on what’s easiest for me.
581. Did you ever sneak out of your house after curfew without your parents knowing?
BWAHA!! Uh, no. Major homebody here. My parents had to kick me out at age 25 or else I would’ve lived with them until I’d gotten married. Probably. LOL It wasn’t in my personality to do something like that, and I didn’t have the type of friends’ worth sneaking out for. Also, we had an alarm system on our house, so every time a door or window opened, it would beep. There was no way we could be shneaky-shneaky even if Sis and I wanted to.
582. What topic do you always “give your two cents” on?
I will always be an advocate for going natural. And I’m not talking walking around naked (although, I like the idea of airing out the hoohah). I mean non-toxic cleaning supplies in my home, non-toxic beauty/skincare products on my face and body, non-toxic bedding and mattresses where I sleep, sustainably made clothing on my clothing rack, naturopathic medicine vs Big Pharma, farmer’s market fruits and veggies vs store bought in my fridge. I’m doing my best to nurture a healthy environment for myself and the planet.
People complain that it’s so expensive to be sustainably conscious. And it is. But you know why? You’re paying for QUALITY NOT QUANTITY. I think these drug commercials are absolutely hilare. Have you listened to the laundry list of side effects? It’s like a damn criminal rap sheet and you want me to take this one tiny pill that’s supposed to help with X, but may cause all these other problems?
583. Do you prefer blue or black inked pens?
No preference. I use both but prefer to use a mechanical pencil when possible.
584. What gives you wanderlust?
Reading the latest issue of International Magazine. Or watching the IG reels about different places that my Sis sends to me.
585. What is your favorite short story?
Awwww, sookie-sookie now. This question is in my wheelhouse since these are the types of stories I plan to write. I don’t have a favorite short story, but I have favorite short story authors. I got hooked on Jane Fox’s Zaftig Dating Agency series during the pandemic and in quarantine with my parents. It amazed me how she could tell a complete story—sex scene included-- in just 4 short chapters! She wrote like close to 100 books in that series and I gobbled them up like chocolate chip cookies.
I’m also a fan of Oliva T. Turner’s books because not only does her shit SIZZLE, but her dedication pages are HILARE. In the most recent book I read, Sizzling in the Mountains (I’m salivating over the covers in this series), the MMC is a firefighter. The dedication states: To my scorching hot local fireman who came to check on my smoke detector last week. Sorry about the messy house and the Dorito dust all over my pajamas.
It’s your turn. This inquiring mind wants to know your answers to these burning questions.
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For the record, I’ve now seen all the male stripper shows: Chippendales, Thunder From Down Under, Magic Mike Live in Vegas, and Magic Mike Australia. Out of all the shows, Magic Mike Live is THE BEST. If you’re ever in Vegas, be sure to check out the show. Chippendales would be a close second.